Fashion Nazis – In Shreveport – Literally!

Hard to put into words exactly how stupid this is:

Youngsters and others who participate in what could be called a fading fad and a fashion faux pas might want to get their belts ready.

Shreveport City Council is expected to discuss an ordinance amendment concerning sagging pants when it meets today. The amendment being proposed by Councilman Calvin Lester would make it unlawful for any person to appear in public wearing pants below the waist that expose skin or undergarments.

My first thought was, wow, can you say “latent racism?” But Calvin Lester – a former criminal defense attorney! – and fellow fashion nazi Mayor Cedric Glover, are both black. Still, I guaran-darn-tee you that the only people who will ever be harassed over this ordinance are young black males. Old guys whose guts are so huge that their belt crosses their thighs? Not going to be an issue. Carpenter cracks? Nope. This is an open invitation for selective enforcement.

And what a great idea that is! Let’s give a group of people who are generally distrustful of the police – young black men – one more reason to fear being harassed and unfairly treated. Amazing.

What purpose does this serve, anyway? I’m not the most imaginative person in the world, but I can’t think of even one way this benefits the public. Sure, some of the folks on that council don’t like saggy pants, but so what? It annoys me when I watch the Today Show and see Matt Lower with his coat unbuttoned, or when I stand behind a guy in a wife beater while in line at the grocery store, and let’s not even get started on women’s clothes. What justifies outlawing the baggy pants but none of the other fashion mistakes? Or are both proper subjects of criminal laws? Could a city council really pass an ordinance prohibiting navy socks with black pants?

And if how you and I dress is the proper subject of criminal sanctions, well, we sure as heck don’t live in the land of the free and the home of the brave. Why stop at clothes? I think it’s disrespectful to go to the store without having showered, so how about an ordinance prohibiting b.o.? Or fines for shaggy hair? What about people with craggy, hairy, stinky feet who wear flip-flops? Lock ’em up, I say.

Now I know all of our local leaders are too wise to pass any of my ridiculous suggestions. My point, though, is that if they have the power to ban baggy pants, they have the power to pass all the examples in my parade of horribles. I don’t know about you, but I much prefer living in a country where city leaders can’t pass laws like this, rather than one in which I just have to trust that they won’t.

Explore posts in the same categories: Big Dumb Government, S'port - Local Laws

7 Comments on “Fashion Nazis – In Shreveport – Literally!”

  1. Del Says:

    From what I hear, this “fashion fad” actually serves the purpose of law & order, as miscreants attempting to flee the police while wearing such pants are so impeded by the waistband around their thighs and the knee-height crotch that they invariably fall down and are captured.

    I agree with everything you’ve said (especially the flip-flops, yuck) but I have to admit I would be happy if I never had to see another black kid with half his drawers hanging out. It always makes me giggle, and I just know one day I’m going to get myself in trouble when one of these guys gets pissed off cause that old white bitch is dissing his fashion statement. I can’t help it; they look just like Dick Van Dyke dancing with the penguins in Mary Poppins.

  2. wheeler Says:

    yeah, i should have made clear that i am by no means endorsing the sag look.

  3. Del Says:

    Wait a minute – I just realized this sounds like it also includes those jeans the girls wear, showing various amounts of skin below the navel. With, um, mixed results. Sometimes it’s those cute lil tummies with navel rings a’winkin’, and sometimes you just have to look away.

    And sometimes those pants are so far below the hipline you wonder what the hell is holding them up.

  4. Sara Says:

    I prefer not to have my tummy or love handles showing, but I’m a 22-year old woman, and if I want to wear jeans and cute tops that occasionally shift in such a way that a quarter-inch of skin shows, well, I’m not hurting anyone. Then again, we just moved out to the middle of nowhere Tuscaloosa County, and I’m jokingly considering donning a burqua whenever I have to go to the feed and seed (yes, it’s the “feed and seed”)so old men will stop winking at me.
    I don’t think I made a point here. Just commenting on psycho lawmakers.

  5. Del Says:

    Those winking old men: Honey, you don’t miss it till it’s gone 🙂

  6. […] fashion nazi Calvin Lester – the moron who gave S’port it’s anti-sagging pants ordinance – was an incompetent attorney prior to beginning his career as an overreaching city councilman: […]

  7. […] was showing. Good for this judge. I hope some of our judges will follow his lead when they confront Shreveport’s version of this stupid law. Explore posts in the same categories: Big Dumb […]

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